Since my creative energy started flowing again over the last several months, I've been frittering a lot of time away on various projects. Writing Chronically Yours, sewing, drawing, painting, working on my 365 project. That on top of the usual things I do these days: self care (sleep/eat/exercise as able; go to appointments/get tests/take supplements and medications), house stuff, garden maintenance; rest, rest, rest... I've been feeling a little all over the place. Not exactly what I was going for.
Bruno and I have had a couple of really great ideas for websites that we could build - one a site for crafty people, which then got delayed by a more urgent idea - the community site for East Van that I posted about recently (this one we actually started building as well). Both of them are projects that I think could be really fantastic. But neither of us are naive, and we know how much time and energy we'd have to put into them to give them a chance to be successful.
Thing is, both of us have other things that we want to work on that are very important to us. For him, it's finding a way to get back into doing web development for news media/journalism. For me, aside from stabilizing my health, it's doing art and figuring out my path to becoming a working artist.
As much as we both have the skills and know-how to build these other projects, and they could be really enjoyable to work on, good community-building tools, etc., it's hard to really dedicate our time and energy to them when they're going to be taking time and energy away from our more overarching goals. And for both of us, this is a really important time for building the careers we've always dreamed of.
The crafty site is totally off the table for the moment, but we've been waffling quite a bit on the East Van site. We know it could be great, and the timing is ideal with the Grandview Woodland plan counter-campaign going on - it'd be a good kick start to the project, which we hope would then carry on for a longer time.
My feelings right now are that as much as I do want to be involved in this, my gut is saying that it's not the right thing for me to do right now. I need to simplify back down to the things that are the most important to me, and let everything else go. Especially with a trip to Belgium (where Bruno is from) coming up in the fall, it's already going to be a challenge to keep up with my current commitments (to my health, the 365 project, getting affairs organized so I can start building my creative business, and publishing issue two of the zine).
It sucks having so many ideas and so many things I enjoy doing, and still so little energy to work on everything... I feel like I'm starting all over again, but with a tenth of the get up and go I had when I was 20 (which was already much less than the average person!). It's a challenge readjusting the goals and expectations I have for myself, but I know that simplifying things is going to be absolutely critical if I want to keep from getting off track again.